DETROIT – Many days I feel like one of those memes with a crazed-looking woman that says something like “I’m just over here trying to keep my kids alive, drink enough water, exercise, read my Bible, pay my bills, and dig myself out of a massive pile of laundry”.
I can get overwhelmed thinking about all the things God’s given me a passion for, all the people He’s placed in my life, all the needs around me. Especially as a church planting wife, my eyes can be easily drawn to the things that should be done or improved.
Psalm 27:4 has brought me back from the brink of crazy too many times to count.
“I have asked one thing from the Lord;
it is what I desire:
to dwell in the house of the Lord
all the days of my life,
gazing on the beauty of the Lord
and seeking him in his temple.”
I love the simplicity of this one desire that trumps all else: to dwell with God, gaze upon His beauty, and come to God to seek/meditate/inquire. It feels like a breath of fresh air to my soul to lay down the laundry, pause my kids’ ministry prep, and sit at His feet.
In Matthew 16 the disciples were talking about how they forgot to bring bread with them. Jesus says “Don’t you understand yet? Don’t you remember the five loaves for the five thousand and how many baskets you collected? Or the seven loaves for the four thousand and how many large baskets you collected?”
I find myself asking the same question. “Don’t I understand yet?” My God is provider. He is sovereign. In each season of motherhood we need to find creative ways to spend intimate time at His feet asking Him to show us again who He is, what He’s like, what He’s doing, where we’re headed, and to help our hearts understand the implications of that, that we might rightly and fully trust Him.
Watching for God’s unwavering faithfulness and promise-keeping throughout scripture is the best dose of encouragement for our hearts in the thick of motherhood. Seeing God be the same throughout history and move powerfully over and over again gives us great confidence that He will do it again in our lives. Our God can feed the 5,000, cares for the lilies and sparrows, raised Himself from the dead, etc. Will He not surely take care of us, our kids, and our ministries?
Later on in Matthew 16, “Jesus turned and told Peter, ‘Get behind me, Satan! You are a hindrance to me because you’re not thinking about God’s concerns but human concerns.’” This is another question I ask myself regularly. Am I thinking about God’s concerns or human ones? Am I living in light of my future hope in Christ or do I have tunnel vision on my tasks for today?
I often need to let someone in on my craziness. When I feel scattered and overwhelmed, I know I need to humble myself, let my community see where I’m at and encourage and pray for me. It can be uncomfortable to start letting others see that we don’t have it together, but it is a beautiful thing to watch our vulnerability give others the freedom to share their struggles too.
When the overwhelm sets in:
Find a way to sit at Jesus’ feet and gaze upon His beauty.
Remember who God is. Count the ways He’s been faithful throughout scripture, history, and your own life. “Don’t I understand yet?”
Pray for God to reorient your eyes to your future hope, that you might live in light of that and not be distracted by the things that won’t matter in light of it.
Remember you are not alone. God has given us a new family: brothers and sisters to walk with as we navigate this broken world together as those who have experienced redemption and restoration through the gospel.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Alyssa Fleet has been involved in three church plants with her husband Ben Fleet, who is lead Pastor of One Eight Church in the Downriver area, south of Detroit. She is a mother of two and is passionate about discipleship, building community, and sharing her life and the gospel with her neighbors. Alyssa has a heart for missions and church planting and feels so blessed to get to live this church planting life by God’s grace.
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